Friday, April 18, 2014

Caught Going Over Fifty in a Thirty-five Zone: The Trauma of Aging

by Violet R. Jones

Since beginning this blog, I have noticed something that I guess I was aware of on a very subconscious level, but had somehow suppressed from my waking knowledge, perhaps because it was too traumatic for me to contemplate. The simple fact is that I am getting older, and the world is getting younger.  I have spent most of my life in the high school classroom (not as a lifelong student, but in front of the room trying to impart knowledge).  I was surrounded every day by youthful inexperience, a vitality sometimes coupled with impulsive bad decisions, but always with a sense of knowing there was more out there to experience and learn. I enjoyed seeing students experience things for the first time, learn  things that older people take for granted, and explore the world around them.   I never really saw myself aging because I was surrounded by youth, and I felt as if I was a part of it. I also felt that students learned from my experience and it never occurred to me that experience is not a valuable commodity.

It is only now when I am no longer in the place I loved most with a piece of chalk ( or dry erase marker/SmartBoard pen) in my hand , and  I am alone by myself to think, to reflect, and to somehow reinvent myself, that I realize the world is being run by a new generation. Yes, it is a generation that I helped to teach, and for the most part , I am proud of them. However, I am not yet even 60, so it is hard for me to separate myself into the category of the aged, but I am getting there.

Why did this revelation come to me only after I started blogging? Well, I really wanted to get an idea of what others were saying on their blogs, both because I didn't want to duplicate it, but also because I didn't want to seem like a "ninny" who is posting about how many fleas were on my dog today...not that I own a dog, but you get the picture.  What I found is that the majority of blogs, not all mind you, but the majority, are by young people in the twenty to thirty-five age bracket.  It is depressing. I am not sure if this anomaly  is because this is the age group that grew up with computers, and they simply know of no other way to communicate, if the older humans out there don't know much about computers and learned other ways of communicating, or if the young generation is all that is left.

It sort of makes me feel like I am in one of those old black and white movies where only one person ( or perhaps two or three) has survived a disaster and is trying to get along in the world where no one like them is left.  It is downright depressing.  I don't feel old, and while I may look old, it isn't my cover that defines the quality of my content, to paraphrase an old standby that "you can't judge a book by its cover".   I know, there I go again with "old" stuff, but it's true.

Why does our society discard anyone who is no longer able to "leap tall buildings with a single bound", or who has more wrinkles than a raisin? Doesn't our society value experience anymore?  I know of several people who have lost their jobs due to their experience. It seems that it is cheaper to hire a newly graduated young person who has to learn how to do the job than it is to hire, or even to keep on the payroll, someone who has been doing the job for a long time and knows how to do things without asking, but must be paid accordingly.

I don't mean to sound bitter. I understand that youth attracts youth, that fresh is associated with better, and old often means that something is beyond its prime. However, humans are not left-over produce, day-old bread, or outdated milk that needs to be discarded. It takes a lifetime to learn what life is about, to understand that all things repeat themselves in one form or another, and to develop a sense of perspective about what is important. These are things that I was always taught were valuable assets.  When I first began my working career, I don't think things were this way. I could be wrong, but it seemed there was the sense that experience was something to be aimed for. I remember not being hired for a position because I "didn't" have enough experience. When did this change? It must have been late in the night while I was sleeping, or while I was grading papers.

I am not asking for the world to change. I understand that the older generations have always given way to the new, but it just seems that we are moving that timeline back year by year.  Where does it stop? I saw a TV program  the other day about a girl who started dating when she was eight years old, and now at  the age of sixteen feels that she is an adult. What I want to know is when will she be considered a senior citizen?

We should not judge people by their age, their looks, the color of their skin, their personal beliefs, or by their socio-economic status. Really, we should not judge people at all. If someone wants to be productive on into their so-called "golden years", then why does society not allow them to do so?

Perhaps the answer lies within the older community itself. If we simply stand back and say, "Oh, I can't do that, I'm too old", or " You can't teach an old dog new tricks", then we are sacrificing at least one-quarter of our lives to be pushed to the back burner. I say we need to unite, heat up the stove, and start cooking!

* I would welcome your thoughts and comments on this topic.

Copyright 2014 Violet Rebecca Jones

No comments:

Post a Comment